groucho and marx

On Vox: In which I become "gun" shy

Baby Bear has broken both of his top two teeth through the gums after lots of not sleeping and generally being fussy.  On our vacation.  Where he slept in the same room as we did.  Which means I have circles the size of the grand canyon beneath my eyes where the lids are already propped up with little toothpicks.

This also means that there are now teeth not only on the bottom, but on the top as well.  Teeth that are sharp enough to break through a very thick gum.

And seeing how he's only 8 months old and not old enough for the milk from a 4-legged bovine, I'm still nursing him.

Okay, enough prepping.

He's BITING me!

as in more than once.

as in it hurts severely.

So much so that I'm becoming "gun" shy.  Or maybe tooth shy would be more apropriate.  As I sit down to nurse, I wonder if this will be the time that he breaks me completely or if I can get him to stop biting before I have to stop nursing. 

The lil' munchkin bit me, but she never bit me time and time again.

I'm in pain, people.

I wonder how young you can use time-outs?

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Vacationing without internet connection

How weird.  I think that's the longest I've been without an internet connection in about 10 years.

A wonderful vacation was had by all and I did keep track of some of the highlights on my laptop - of course it was used as a word processor without connection to the world wide web, but enjoy :)  More to come when I finally dig out from under a week's worth of things to do!

I'm also working on getting pictures posted, but for now, they're on my flickr account, so check them out :)

________

September 9, 2007

 

It’s amazing how an organized person can be made to feel like a complete scatterbrain when packing for herself, a 2 ½ year old, an 8 month old, and food for the entire family.  I took Friday off in order to pack with the expectations that my beloved would be home and we would leave for the mountains around noon.  I awoke around 4 with Bear and stayed up to get a few things done for work before truly beginning my vacation.

 

My beloved came down for coffee around 5:30 and by 6:15, I heard the lil’ munchkin traipsing down the stairs.  As I looked up to see her descent, I had to chuckle.  She had her stuffed dog and her “ballet” shoes clutched to her chest and claimed that she was ready for “bay k shun.”  It was simply about the cutest moment considering she didn’t even truly understand what vacation is.

 

At 6:30, I carried a pajama clad toddler to the car to ride along to the grocery store with me.  We were out of milk, so I figured there was no sense in waiting until later in the day.

 

By 7:30 am, I had both kids in the bath and was scrubbing them down so that they would only have the grime of traveling on them by the end of the day.

 

By 10:00 am, I had showered and was attempting to pack for myself.  The lil’ munchkin decided to help me and I had to temper allowing her to help me and not packing the entire bathroom into my toiletry bag.  We finally worked up a system so that I made a pile of things to be packed and she in turned packed them for me.

 

As the clock struck 10:30, I was finally packing the car and was feeling rather good.  It’d only taken me three times as long as it normally would.  Actually, knowing me, BK (Before Kids), I would have been packed the night before and been ready to go the moment I stepped foot downstairs.  But that’s one of the many ways that life changes AK (After Kids).

 

When my beloved arrived home at 12:20, I had only made 6,392 additional trips to the car to add “one more thing” that I had suddenly remember would make our trip a little easier.

 

12:40 PM.  Me, Beloved, Lil’ Munchkin, and Bear all piled into the Sienna that I had borrowed from work, along with the 15,235 pounds of “necessities” and we left for vacation.

 

The drive started off smoothly enough.  The lil’ munchkin had wanted to hold off eating lunch so that she could “picnic” in “her new car” (sidenote that she has fallen in love with the minivan – the fact that she can climb in the back and go up to her seat, the doors all open automatically, and the DVD all add up to her liking this better than mommy’s 4Runner).  After she finished her lunch, I told her it was time to take a nap and again, the novelty of taking a nap in the new car compared to her boring old bed worked like a charm.

She dozed off and we drove in peace for about 90 minutes.  We made a stop here and we made a stop there.  By 5:30, we had made it to Hays, Kansas and we decided to call it a day.  We found a hotel and unpacked 12,593 pounds of what we had brought.  We went to dinner and the lil’ munchkin thought it rather grand that she would get to sleep with Mom and Dad.

 

Saturday morning we awoke to a crying Bear and try as I may, It’s hard to not wake everyone else up in a small hotel room.  I changed him and nursed and then as he babbled away, my beloved awoke and then the lil’ munchkin.  At 6 am, I took the lil’ munchkin down for some breakfast and by 8:30, we were heading to the local Natural History museum to visit the dinosaurs.

 

The lil’ munchkin was very excited about getting to see the dinosaurs.  That is until we walked into the display room with animatronic dinosaurs and a soundtrack of dinosaur and ocean sounds.  She clung to me like an infant monkey and clenched the skin on my neck with her little monkey hands until I thought I would scream.  I must say that I can relate though.  As I reached out and touched one to tell her that they didn’t move, I looked up and it was chewing on grass.  I yanked my hand back in a very startled fashion and then tried to cover my actions as to not scare the lil’ munchkin any further.

 

After a quick trip to the discovery room and then the gift shop where we actually purchased a ball for Gidget the Cat at the lil’ munchkin’s request, we were back on the road.

 

The kids slept once again and all was right in our world.  That is until they awoke.

 

Screaming ensued.

 

SCREAMING.

 

Add to that one husband that doesn’t deal well with screaming.

 

I was ready to ride on the roof of the car.

 

Or go home.

 

I would have been fine with that as well.

 

The lil’ munchkin began to cry as she repeated over, and over, and over again that she wanted OUT.  My beloved threatened to oblige and I became irritated at that.  She then began to whine that she wanted her bay k shun!  That did get a little grin out of me even though I had to reach way down to expose it in the vehicle with two crying kids and one patience-lacking husband.

 

By the time we made it into Colorado Springs, the directions to where we were going became rather screwy.  We wasted at least an hour to an hour and a half going in the wrong directions.

 

But we did finally make it to the Cabin.  Patience-lacking husband, Completely exhausted, hungry, bored 8 month old, and defeated, tired lil’ munchkin.

 

It was late and we unpacked the car as the lil’ munchkin looked over our house.  The excitement pinged off of the lil’ munchkin like an electrical storm and it wasn’t long before the stress of being stuck in a car, going the wrong direction, and being stir-crazy had dissipated.  I fed Bear and got him off to bed and we let the lil’ munchkin stay up for a little while longer.  I made the beds and by 9:30 our time, we were all in bed, worn out, but happy that we were here.

 

We are all sleeping in the loft area of the cabin and the lil’ munchkin has her own little loft bed.  With all of us sleeping in the same room, I wasn’t real shocked that I didn’t sleep well.  Every little noise that Bear made I was up to check on him.  Finally about 2 am, I came downstairs with him, let him nurse, and he slept for another 2 hours.  By 4 am, however, he’d decided it was time to be up.  Of course that is 5 am by our normal time, so I guess I can’t complain too tremendously.  Actually, yes I can. It sucked.

 

I sit here typing now with my beloved laying on the couch entertaining Bear, the lil’ munchkin still sleeping, and feeling very relaxed as I watch out the windows of this beautiful cabin and into the tree- ridden area that will be ours for the next several day.  We are so remote that we don’t have cell phone coverage and we’re worried about even finding our way back out.

 

Ah, Bay k shun.

 

September 10, 2007

 

Bear is officially 8 months old.  Eight months?  Can that truly be right?  Sometimes it seems as though I was still pregnant just yesterday, yet it also seems that he’s been in our lives so much longer than a mere eight months.

 

He’s sitting on the floor “talking” as I type this.  We are playing peek-a-boo around my laptop, and he’s blowing so many raspberries that I very well may have to get a wet-mop in here when we’re done.  His smiling is absolutely stunning and can melt the heart of anyone he meets.  And he’s very generous with giving it to people.  I don’t think there’s been a time when someone’s said hello to him and he hasn’t smiled at them.  Most people are in shock at how happy he is. 

 

We are still on vacation in the mountains and it’s been so nice to have the time with him and his sister.  My beloved and I are looking forward to the time when I am able to stay home with them.  It will be a very tough decision when the time actually comes.  Or maybe I should say it’ll be tough to actually do.  I enjoy working.  I enjoy the interaction with my fellow associates, and I work for an absolutely incredible company.  But my kids are just that and this is time that I’ll never be able to get back. Seeing them grow and change so much is an awe-inspiring time.

 

Bear is rolling across the floor laughing at himself doing so.  He’s beginning to crawl a little – he took his first “crawl” Friday morning and has done a few more since then.  He’s also cut a new top tooth and I think his second top tooth is about to break through any minute. This will be number four for him and he’s, uh, used them on me a few times.

 

He loves people and he has a thing for ears and noses.  And of course mom’s hair.  I had him in the backpack carrier yesterday as we were going through the Dinosaur center and within seconds of putting him on, he had to be moved to Dad’s back or I wouldn’t have had any hair left.  We had to chuckle to see this little boy with clumps of red hair streaming through his hands though.

 

This little boy that we were so worried about at birth has proven that he’s very strong and nothing in life will get him down. 

 

Bear, I love you tremendously and look forward to each subsequent month with you.  I look forward to not every milestone, but the mundane times of doing nothing but holding you as well.

 

Happy eight months, Bear.

 

September 11, 2007

Today is the last day in the mountains before we begin our long drive home.  We’ve had a great time thus far.  Some friends of ours met us out here and we’ve been able to get together with them and let the kids play, have some good food, and some good conversation.  It’s always interesting watching young kids play together and interact.  Their son, A, is about 14 months and was very interested in watching the lil’ munchkin.  He would also sit and play beside Bear.  The lil’ munchkin had to learn that mom can hold another baby and it doesn’t mean that she’s not loved.  We had a couple of instances of jealousy when I held A, but overall, the kids all did wonderfully together.

 

Bear had a bit of a rough day yesterday seeing how one of his top teeth wants to come out but the gum it sits beneath doesn’t want it to.  The poor little guy hasn’t been a great eater for the past few days as the first top tooth broke through, but it didn’t seem to cause him too much grief.  The second one, however, has given him a very swollen gum, an appetite that can’t be satiated do to the pain of his mouth, and a case of the crankies.  My heart hurts for the little guy knowing that there’s not much I can do other than a little pain medication here and there.

 

Yesterday we went to the Manitou Cave Dwellings and the lil’ munchkin was enthralled with the structures that were built into the rock.  They were occupied until 1984.  It simply amazes me to see how they lived in comparison to how we live today.

 

 

A Sister’s Love

The lil’ munchkin absolutely adores Bear.  She loves being his big sister, and she loves to help with him in any way she can.  I put them both upstairs in the loft bedroom for a nap yesterday afternoon.  Lil’ munchkin in her bed and Bear in his playpen.  I went back downstairs to visit with our friends and before long, I heard the lil’ munchkin squealing.  As I started up the stairs, I could clearly hear what she was saying.  She was very excited.  Why?  Bear was crawling.  She was overjoyed with that simple act that my heart nearly exploded with love and pride for the little girl. 

 

Two nights ago, I had put both kids to bed and went downstairs to brush my teeth.  It wasn’t long before Bear decided to vocalize that he wasn’t real happy about being put to bed and that he wanted more snuggles.  The cabin’s loft offers an opportunity to hear the kids rather easily, and shortly after the cries started, I heard the little pitter patter of feet.  They stopped and I heard, “It’s okay,” and then the little pitter patter of feet again as she padded back to her bed.

 

 

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Bay k shun

Tomorrow is the day.

The day that we've been waiting for for many months.

We leave for vacation tomorrow.  Or bay k shun as the lil' munchkin says it. 

We've rented a cabin in the mountains and are looking forward to seeing the wonderful sights and some desperately needed family time.

The lil' munchkin is very excited about seeing the mountains and being able to ride a horse.  Baby Bear is getting over (hopefully) another respiratory issue, so I'm hopeful that the clean mountain air does him so good and he's able to kick this.

Most likely no posts for the next week, but lots of pictures when I get back!

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: She does love me...

The lil' munchkin is very much a mama's girl.  She always has been, and I don't really foresee that changing anytime in the real near future.

This has, on occassion, made my beloved feel like he doesn't matter as much.  I've told him numerous times that she does love him, more than he realizes.  But those are just words and simply don't mean as much as actions.

The lil' munchkin resumed gymnastics, commonly known as "nastics" around our house, this week.  This has been a Daddy/Daughter activity for us and has allowed the lil' munchkin some well needed quality Daddy time.  For this semester, however, we moved her up to the 3 year old class.  Not only are the kids a little older, but they also don't allow the parent to assist in the class.  We thought this would be a good opportunity for her as she seemed to have learned everything she could in the two year old (parent participatory) class.

Her class was to begin at 6 pm, and at 6:15 pm, I received a call from my beloved stating that we had a bit of a problem.  It seems that the lil' munchkin wasn't so happy when she realized that Daddy couldn't be right there beside her.  She truly did not want him to watch her from the upstairs and panicked when she discovered that this is what the class was all about.

Daddy and Daughter had a heard to heart talk after class and decided that it would be best, for the time being at least, to go back to the 2 year old class.  The agreed to it over ice cream.  Where the lil' munchkin ordered a cone.  A cone with no ice cream.  Because she simply wanted the sprinkles.

When the arrived back home, the lil' munchkin proceeded to tell me that she had been too scared not to have Daddy there and she wanted to do the little girl class so he could be with her.

That evening, I saw more interaction between the two of them and I think I fell in love all over again.  Seeing my daughter and my husband have that special bond that I know is possible from my own father simply puts such a feeling in me that I simply don't have the ability to fully express. 

I think my beloved learned more from that 3 year old gymnastics class than all the kids put together.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Does that require schooling?

The lil' munchkin and I were watching America's Funniest Home Videos last night when it showed a preschool graduation.  Each child stepped up on the stage and answered, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"  The first child replied, "a Vampire Bat," the second child replied, "I don't want to grow up."  As I sat and chuckled, I took advantage to ask the lil' munchkin what she wanted to be when she grows up.  She bounced the question back to me and asked, "What can I be when I grow up?"  Being 100% sincere, I responded that she could be anything she wanted to be. 

I guess she took me literally, because she immediately had an answer.  "Corn." 

I wanted to clarify and asked her, "Corn on the cob?" 

LM: "Yes, and toast"

Well okay then.  I guess we'll save on college then.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: The desire for more

My beloved and I have been extraordinarily lucky in the temperament of our two kids.  After the lil' munchkin was born and we started talking about the second, we were convinced that we'd been so lucky with her being such a laid back child that our second would be collicky until their 18th birthday... and possibly beyond.  Bear's arrival, however, has proven differently though.  He has been even more laid back than his sister - something I didn't think possible.  The child has a smile for everyone he sees, laughs far more than he even thinks about crying, eats well, sleeps well, and is one of the happiest babies one could ever meet.

This has pretty well convinced my beloved and I that we do, indeed, desire a third child.  We've talked about having them the same distance as Munchkin and Bear, but lately, we seem to be thinking even sooner. Three children?  Yes, three children.  This excites me as I am at my absolute happiest when I'm around my children.  Their laughter, smile, and hugs are better than any stimulant known to man.  It's hard not being with them each day as I drive away to work.  We want to get to the point where I can stay home with them and truly raise them. 

Growing up, I never thought I'd have more than two kids, but that desire to have one more is getting stronger each day.

Me. A mom to three.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: That's a good idea...

I know it's been over a week since I've posted anything and why it might seem that there's not been anything going on for me to post about, it's been just the opposite.  So much has been going on that I haven't had time to post.  With my beloved finished with school, we've been so busy trying to get things done with the house that we've barely had time to breathe.  We are currently getting ready to have a new patio poured, staining of the deck and fence had to be done, and then, of course, there are two little very loveable beings that deserve <and get> a great deal of our attention.

Baby Bear is growing so quickly and is closing in on the 20 lb mark.  You better not pick up anything that you don't want him to have if you're holding him, because he's grabbing EVERYTHING.  He discovered that the remote control makes an excellent teething toy the other day.  I finally lowered his crib as I realized he would pull up on it soon and shock me if I wasn't prepared for it.  Mobility is his new friend and while he's not crawling yet, he's discovered that rolling is just as effective.  He will roll from one end of the living room to the other before you know it.  We discovered this the hard way one day after I had left for work and my beloved was in the shower.  He suddenly heard the lil' munchkin screaming bloody murder and then her brother's name.  Rich rushed out to see what had happened and discovered a crying baby on the floor.  He had rolled right off of the bed and lil' munchkin was extremely worried about her little brother.

That is very indicative of their relationship.  They think the world of one another and each can make the other smile faster than you could turn to look at each of them.  I adore watching them together.

Lil' munchkin is becoming quite the little grown up.  She insists on doing most things "by myself" these days and her conversation skills have jumped to the level of most 4 and 5 year olds that I know.  Her latest is when you ask her to do something, she'll respond by saying, "That's a good idea!" in her singy little voice.

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Once again, a family

He's done it.

My beloved has finally done it.

When we met, I was going to school full time.

The lil munchkin was born in December 2004.

My beloved began working on his Master's in January 2005.

I finished my Bachelor of Science degree in May 2005.

Baby Bear was born January 2007.

August 10, 2007, my beloved turned in his final paper.

He's done with school.

OFFICIALLY!

What will we do with all the time together!

Congratulations, beloved, I'm proud of you!

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Seven Months bring about change

Big Sister and Baby Brother

Cute Patooties

The changes are simply stunning at this age.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: A clown, a princess, a bag lady

Silly is as silly does

Peek-a-boo!

Eclectic Taste

It doesn't matter as long as she can put it on.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: That's what it's all about

It's 1:50 on a Saturday afternoon and I'm sitting at my computer after having just gotten both kids off for naps.  We're a little late today due to the lil' munchkin's "reward" occurring at noon.  Our local shopping center was hosting Disney Radio, so the the entire family traipsed up to the Disney store and then on to the party.  My beloved had to leave to meet a few friends and then Grandma and Grandpa T. joined the fun.  The lil' munchkin was excited when they arrived and immediately hijacked pa-pa into taking her to play on the "fruit"  <a rather large play area that consists of a plate, a knife, and humongous pieces of fruit for the kids to play on>  I took the opportunity to give Bear his lunch and sat and visited with my mom.  Everyone was in such a good mood and I realized that I am at my utmost happiest when I'm surrounded by my family.  My husband, my daughter, and my son deserve the best of me, but sometimes, I feel like they get the worst of me.  They are the ones that can make me smile at the drop of a hat, a smile, a hug, or simply a look.  They are the ones that get me when I'm tired, when I'm cranky, and when I'm sick.  We spend so much of our time at our job that sometimes it's hard to remember that it's not our life.  I had an immense amount of joy seeing my kids laugh and play at the Disney function today.  Lil' munchkin and I danced, ate, shopped, and as I held her swinging my hips to the music, she gave me the sweetest hug.  They make everything worth while. 

Beloved, Muchkin, and Bear.  They are what life is all about.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Newsletter: 7 months

Dear Bear,

I look at the calendar and realize that you are seven months old today.  That seems wrong in that I can't believe you're already 7 months old, yet at the same time, it seems that you've been in my life for so much longer.  I can't imagine life without you.

You are sitting up rather well now and you are talking all the time.  Da-da comes out of your mouth even when I try to coax you to say ma-ma. You also are fascinated with blowing raspberries.  You have quickly become a pro at that and I chuckle each time I wipe the slobber from your chin that appeared after doing a 30 second raspbery.  You are so proud of yourself and I can't help but smile.

You adore your big sister and the feeling is mutual.  You stare at one another in the backseat of the car and the car is soon filled with laughter between you giggling at whatever it is your sister is doing to entertain you, her laughing because you're laughing at her, and Daddy and I laughing at the exchange between the two of you.  She will shake her head back and forth and then you do the same and then burst into a giggle that could make the entire world join in.  You and her have developed such a special relationship that it makes my heart warm to watch.  I hope that you both are able to maintain this relationship throughout your entire lives. 

You are truly the happiest baby that I've ever laid eyes on.  Other people comment on the same thing.  Coming home from work to you and your sister each day is the best mood enhancer that exists.  Seeing your face light up at the sight of me makes me happier than you'll ever understand. At least until you have kids of your own one of these days.

Each morning I go in to get you out of your crib and you are happily playing with your toes in your crib.  You look up at me and I look back in amazement at how special of a little guy you are.  I truly don't know how your Dad and I got so lucky to have such laid back kids.  You only cry when you truly need something.

You have your two bottom teeth in, and I can vouch for the fact that they are very sharp, indeed.  You are eating all kids of baby food, and I have yet to find something that you don't like.  You take it all in stride and feeding you often reminds me of a baby bird.  The minute I put a bite in, you swallow it and the mouth is wide open again.  You can put away a meal in a matter of minutes.  You are beginning to eat a few finger foods and I don't think you quite understood the first few times why I wasn't putting it in your mouth, but in your hand.  It didn't take long though for you to realize what it was for as you gummed it to smithereens.

You are fascinated by all of the animals running around, and they best stay out of your reach if they don't want to have a handful of hair grabbed.  You smile at them and reach for them any opportunity you have.  Your got a handful of your sister's cat, Gidget's, hair this morning.  Your sister went beserk in telling you to leave her alone.  I had to chuckle some though as I thought of how she did the exact same thing to her.

You are beginning to get up on your hands and knees somewhat, so I know you'll be crawling before too long.  The thought of that amazes me.  It will change your world, as well as ours, tremendously.  You'll soon be able to explore so far beyond what you've been able to thus far.

Seven months.  It's gone so fast.  You are growing so quickly and I treasure each and every moment that I have with you.

Your Daddy and I love you.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Well neither do I!

The lil' munchkin awoke this morning and came to watch cartoons on our bed.

I began to choose something to wear to work, and while I generally put pants and then select a blouse to wear, I knew what blouse I wanted to wear today, so I put it on and began to button it.

The lil' munchkin looked at me and, obviously, something seemed amis to her.

"Mommy, put pants on!"

"Cause I don't like your butt!"

 

Glad I needed a boost to my ego today...

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: 31 Months

Dear Munchkin,

 

Today you've been on this earth for 31 months.  You've changed mine and your Dad's lives so completely.  When you arrived on December 27, 2004, we fell in love with you instantly.  That love grows each and every day.  You are a wonderful little girl that is very much her own person.  You have an independent streak in you the size of the Grand Canyon.  You have no fear when it comes to trying new things.  You love to "nuggle" with us and play each night. As evening draws near, you give your baby brother a true bear hug and nearly alwasy insist on helping me put him to bed.  You can bring out a smile in him just by looking at him.  The relationship that has developed between the two of you is priceless.  I wish this for you always.

After brother goes to bed, you crawl onto our bed and insist that we play with you.  "Tickle me" is often heard, as is "count for me" when you want to play hide and seek.  You still haven't discovered that you're not truly hidden just because you cover your head up or close your eyes.  It's priceless to watch you hide in the exact same spot for the fifth time in a row and hear you squeal with delight when we "find" you. 

You request to watch "Funny Bib be boes" about 5 times a day and laugh even at the reruns.

You already have a love of fashion, inexplicably shoes.  You received two new pairs of shoes in the mail the other day and although they were for winter, you insisted on putting them on.  The next morning you wanted to wear the black pair and when I told you that you needed sandals, you disappeared only to reappear a bit later with shoes and panties on, declaring that you had found sandals. You also adore playing dress up and have to wear a dress nearly every day. 

You are an extraordinarily loving child who would live in my arms if we could find a way to make it work.  When you do get in trouble, it breaks your heart as much as anything and the wails that you emit saw at my heart.

You are still taking gymnastics on a weekly basis and that has become your and Daddy's time.  You always arrive back home anxious to show me the stamps that you got on your hands and generally your feet too.  He also takes you to the library twice a month and you prepare for that by gathering your books and placing them in your book bag.  You look like such a little school girl as you leave the house.

Your playmate at the sitter's house begins pre-school in less than a month.  He's 13 months older than you and this will leave you with just your baby brother and and one other baby.  Because of this, we are trying to find a 2 year old preschool class to put you in.  The thought of my baby girl going to school is one that I have a hard time wrapping my head around.  We will do it though as it will be best for you to have other kids around. 

You still adore your "kitty-kitty cat" Gidget and even though I think she's grown nearly as fast as you, you still insist on picking her up.

 

As big as she is...

Gidget is pretty laid back but even she has her threshold.  We had to have her hind claws taken out so that she wouldn't be able to scratch you.  When she got home, you wanted so badly to take care of her boo-boos and see to it that she got better.

Lil' Munchkin, your Dad and I couldn't imagine our lives without you.  You've made them so much richer, and for that, we just want to tell you that we love you.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: He's stronger than I am

Baby Bear has hit a growth spurt.  Either that, or he's just getting an early start on torturing me.  He's been up every night this week wanting to eat.  Interrupting my sleep.  So not fair.  Last night, he I heard him at 3:00 AM.  I tried to see if he would go back to sleep.   I was determined that I wasn't going to nurse him lest I reinforce this nightly feeding.  He complained about my lack of response by simply becoming louder.  I dragged my exhausted body from beneath the covers and stumbled into his room.I gave him his binky.

He sucked on for 5 seconds and spit it out.

I held his binky for him.

I sat in the chair.

He cried.

I changed his diaper.

I snuggled him and gave him his binky.

He dozed off.

I gently placed him back in bed and headed back for more sleep.

The clock read 3:41.

I dozed off.

He cried.

He wailed.

The clock read 3:50.

I stumble from bed and down the hall yet again.

I give in and nurse.

I was able to go back to bed about 4:15 am.  Just enough time to get to sleep before my alarm sounded at 5:00 am.

I've gotta give it to him.  He's stronger than I am.

It doesn't help that when I went to wake him at 6:30 that he gave me the widest, happiest grin ever. 

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Daddy-Daughter time equals Mommy-Son time

The lil' munchkin has been taking gymnastics for about 7 or 8 weeks now.  Daddy takes her and that leaves about an hour and 15 minutes or so for Bear and me to have some quality time together.  Sometimes it's just the rush of getting him fed, changed, and ready for bed, but last night, we finished eating about the time they left for gymnastics.  I got out some toys for him and we began to play.

Of course, then I had to get out the camera - what move does either of my children make without it being documented in some way...

It wasn't long before the little man was worn out and just wanted to snuggle close, so I changed his diaper and put him into a sleeper and we made off to snuggle.  As he snuggled into me, I could look at that face forever.

By 7 pm, he was in bed for the night, and just in time as I heard the door open and "mommmmyyyyy" soon follow.

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Anytime Sweetie

This weekend, the lil' munchkin and I decided to have a picnic in our new family room.  Baby Bear was sleeping and Daddy had a severe headache and was trying to sleep it away, so it was just her and me.  We put Monsters, Inc. in to watch and while she watched it, I designed my new mother's bracelet to include Bear in the mix.

As lunchtime drew near, I left her engrossed in the movie and went up to find something for lunch.  I suddenly realized that she had yet to have the classic childhood lunch of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. 

I gathered everything together and spread the jelly and smeared the peanut butter across the bread.  I also grabbed a slice of string cheese and a small bag of chips to make her picnic lunch complete.  I placed her plate on the ottoman and she dug into the chips without a word.  As she polished those off, she asked what the sandwich was.  I told her it was peanut butter and jelly and she pulled it apart to reveal the insides.  She then proceeded to lick the jelly side and proclaimed to me, "mmm, thank you mommy!" I had to chuckle as she continued to lick off the new found treat from the bread.  After she had most the of residue from that slice, she eyed the peanut butter.  She tentatively licked it, although she has had it before, it didn't seem quite familiar to her.  It's yummy factor quickly kicked in as she licked as much off as she could and then even ate the bread that was attached to it.

I giggled once more when she told me how yummy her lunch was.

Properly satiated, she didn't even complain when the movie was over and it was naptime.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Six months, already?

Six months ago today, I was lying in a bed in the hospital, about to meet my son for the first time.  I was anxious to hold him in my arms and verify that he was a a healthy baby.  My emotions were on overload from fear, hormones, and pain.  At 10:59 in the morning, my son had made his entrance into the world.  Screaming.  Apparently healthy.  I felt a rush of relief as well as a myriad of emotions that I couldn't explain.  Tears came to my eyes as they placed my son on my chest for the first time.

My beloved and I held him.  The pure innocence of this child that we were holding was enough to render us speechless.  I choked back tears as we sat and watched out little bundle of joy.

My delivery this time around was so much easier than last time, and within a couple of hours, I was up walking around and by the next day, I was ready to take my bouncing bundle home.

He was nursing like a champ and I was feeling rather confident.  Of course, we weren't allowed to go home that day, but the next morning, I was showered, dressed, and waiting on the doctors to give us one last check up and release us to go home.  My beloved and the lil' munchkin showed up and we packed things up and by 11 am, we were putting the little man into his car seat.

We made it home before the storm got too bad- remember it was January - and began to settle in to the changes that were happening.

Baby Bear was such a good baby from the very beginning.  He nursed and slept.  Though we had a few challenges during those first couple of months - colds for both kids, inguinal hernia and resulting surgery at just under 7 weeks - it was rather routine.  By his two week checkup, he had surpassed his birth weight and was doing well.

At 3 1/2 months, my maternity leave was over and I had to go back to work, which meant going to the sitter's for both kids.  The first week was somewhat rough, but he soon transitioned to the new routine.

I look at him now and see my uber-happy baby boy and long to have more time with him.  He's learned so much, but I have too.

  I've learned that having a second child doesn't detract from the first one, but your love simply doubles.  I've learned that even a being that doesn't "do much" can capture your heart in the blink of an eye. 

Most of all?  I've learned I love having a son.

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Baby Bear is quickly losing the baby

Baby Bear won't be a baby for long.  It seems he's reminding me of that with each passing day.  Yesterday, just days shy from the 6 month old mark, he rolled from his back to his tummy.  He's been doing tummy to back for sometime, and even attempted back to tummy a few times but couldn't quite get where that arm needed to be to prevent it from being a road block to his body.  But alas, he finally made it.  All. By. Himself.  To top that off, I've been working with him to sit up and he's able to sit for a few seconds by himself before he topples over and his world seems to have gone topsy-turvy.  The look on his face when that happens is one of pure confusion.  Sit him on the bed and he remains upright for even a few seconds longer.

He's no longer this skinny little baby that we were so concerned with.  Every little move he did or didn't make had us concerned.  I'm confident that he is a healthy little guy and his baby-ness is quickly packing its bags and buying a ticket to nevermore land. 

You can't look at this child without him bursting into a smile.  Without him making you feel like you're the most special person on the planet.  Even strangers.  People comment on what a cutie he is and the grin just pours out of him.  He'll even reward some with an added little chuckle. 

It wasn't too many days ago that I was home with both kids and the days and nights were still somewhat long.  Now I just long to have those days back with him.

Maternity leave is such a bittersweet time.  You want to enjoy each passing moment with them, but at the same time, you want to get through those first few, hardest months.  The time when they aren't sleeping, which in turn, means mom doesn't sleep either. 

About the time things start to even out and the household gets back to normal <well, as normal as life can be after kids>, it's back to work.  Back to having so few hours with them that you barely want to let them out of your grasp when you are able to be with them.

Such is life.

My beloved and I are working towards getting things so that I can stay home with the kids.  We both want a third child, and we realize that it's not feasible with both of us working like we are.  At least not with our sanity intact.

I look at not only Baby Bear, but the lil' munchkin and think of the saying, "the days are long but the years are short."  This can be so true.  I just chide myself for not enjoying each and every moment that I have with them.  I don't want to rush away any moment, even the rough ones.  My babies are growing so quickly.  As long as they know that they'll both always be my babies.  No matter how old they are.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Did my neighbor just decide that I shouldn't have any more kids?

We had new neighbors move in several months back and being the normal household with two working parents, we hadn't had a chance to meet them yet.  After 3 1/2 months on maternity leave with our second child, I headed back to the office. Shortly after I started back to work however, I had the wonderful opportunity to meet the wife and daughter.  I had just pulled into my drive and as I was unloading the kids from the car, here she comes.  I stepped out into the driveway toting a carseat full of baby, and keeping one eye on the 2 year old toddler running like crazy around the driveway.

She introduced herself and her daughter - about 9 months younger than the lil' munchkin.  Before I have a chance to say much of anything, she is stating that she would like to go through the lil' munchkin's clothes since it didn't look like we would need them anymore since we had a boy this time.  I stood there in shock wondering if my neighbor had truly just decided that I wouldn't have any more kids.  Yes, two is probably the norm, but we've considered a third, and regardless, is that truly something you say to someone you meet for the first time?

It didn't stop there though.  Oh no.  She was scoping out my garage and noticed a trike and declared to me that they would be needing one of those as well.   

I quickly ended the conversation before she decided what I could keep and what I needed to get rid of and escaped into my home.

Don’t you wish you could have just handed them this?

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Mental Note to Self

The lil' munchkin is currently taking a gymnastics class with Daddy and on Thursday nights, for 4 weeks, her and I go to a "Mommy and Me" dance class.  Last night was our second class.  As soon as I picked up the kids from the sitter's, we rushed home so the munchkin could eat and I could nurse Baby Bear.  By 5:20, Daddy had made it home and I was helping the lil' munchkin get changed into her leotard and skirt for the class.  I set out baby food for Bear, gave my beloved a quick hug and kiss, and the lil' munchkin and I headed for the door.  I scooped her into the car, buckled her in, and we took off for dance class.

Being the scatter brain that I am, I turned the wrong direction out of the neighborhood and had to turn around.  My little backseat driver immediately questioned if the class "wasn't that way, but is this way?"  I gave her an affirmative as I chuckled to myself.

As we made it through the neighborhoods and onto the access road, the lil' munchkin piped up from the back seat, "Go fast, mommy."  I told her I was going as fast as I could, and she again requested, "go faster."  I goosed it a little and delighted, she said, "thank you, mommy, for going faster."  I had to bite my tongue from laughing as I didn't want her to think I was laughing AT her.  It didn't stop there though.  She then told me that was just a "little faster."  She now wanted to go "a big faster."  I couldn't restrain a giggle this time and had to call my beloved to tell him the latest.

I then responded to her that if I went "a big faster" that we might get pulled over by a cop and get a ticket.

I think it was at this point in the evening that I made a mental note to myself that I needed to postpone her receiving her driver's license as long as possible.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Your money is my money

I awoke on the 4th of July ready to make a dent in my to-do list.  I began working outside decluttering our soon to be patio area.  I decided to rid our yard of our glider, the kids' glider, our fire pit, a birdbath, and a few other items.  I dragged them all to the curb since "big trash" day is approaching and I wanted our house to fit in with the other houses that had cluttered curbs.

My beloved and I decided to go to Lowe's for more mulch and we would go ahead and landscape the front where we've just had flowers up to this point.  We left the house about 10:30 and about halfway there, the lil' munchkin declared she was hungry.  I hadn't realized that yes, it was indeed, snack time.  Knowing that neither of us had cash on us, I told my beloved to stop by Quick Trip where I was sure I had enough change to buy a package of cheese and crackers to hold her over until lunch.

I dug my wallet from my post-baby <read: no longer small and dainty> purse and emptied a handful of change into my palm.  I sat there picking out quarters and the lil' munchkin spied all of the silver and mightily declared, "mommy, give me my money!"

Is nothing mine?

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: The bond of siblings

Growing up, I was the baby in my family.  It was just me and my older brother.  We were always extraordinarily close and while he would pick on me, no one else was allowed to.  I idolized my big brother and was always thankful to have him.  To this day, our relationship has changed, but we're still close.  It's just more email than hanging out.  Life happens like that and it's nice to be able to have some measure to keep in touch.

It's interesting to me though to see that bond develop.  The lil' munchkin simply adores her little brother and the feeling is mutual.  In the car he just stares at her with the biggest grin on his face and a single word evokes little giggles from him.  She stares over at him and continues to tell me to "look at him!  he's smiling at me!"  My heart flutters for the love that these two have for each other.  I can't help but chuckle at the relationship that is already so strong between them. 

Occasionally, the lil' munchkin awakes in the morning crying.  She did this the other day and I comforted her from what I can only assume was a bad dream.  I put her on my bed and told her I needed to get Baby Bear.  She insisted on coming with me and once we walked into his room, the tears stopped and his smile spread to her.  I picked him up and carried them both back down the hall to my bedroom so that I could finish getting ready for work. 

As I put the lil' munchkin on the bed, the laid down on the pillow and requested bubby to lay beside her.  I did as she requested and within a moment, the tear-stained face was smiling and her hand had found his.  My two kids lay there holding hands in what nearly brought a tear to my face.

Siblings are a wonderful thing and offer a kinship throughout life.  I know that there will be days when I'm having to pull these two apart just to keep them safe from the other, but I also know that in the long run, they will have a relationship that they know the other one will always be there for them. 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Learning the code of women

I typically try not to post anything that will thoroughly embarrass either of the kids when they're dating, but some things are simply irresistible...

The lil' munchkin is an early bird.  She was up at 5:30 this morning and her and I came down for coffee and chocolate milk.  We crammed ourselves into Daddy's chair to proceed to watch cartoons.  I began checking email on my laptop as she became engrossed in the Disney Channel. 

All of a sudden, I heard the lil' munchkin "toot."  I didn't think too much about it, as obviously, that type of thing happens.  But what really got me was the lil' munchkin pointing her finger at me and stating, "That was you."  I chuckled and told her that, no it wasn't.  She then stated, "It wasn't me!"

Amazing how early females learn to deny, deny, deny.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Poor Baby

Baby Bear caught a cold around 2 or 3 weeks of age and has simply been congested since then.  Some days it's worse than others, but this past weekend, the kids caught another cold and poor Bear's congestion increased.  I received a call from the sitter Tuesday at lunch telling me that Bear wouldn't take a bottle.  he'd eaten some sweet potatoes, but no milk.  That was at 12:30 and he was sound asleep.  I told her to try again when he awoke and to let me know.  I spoke with her at 1:30 and he had taken 5 ounces.  By 3:00, I decided that I needed to get him in to see teh doctor.  At 4:30, I towed both kids into the pediatrician's office to see what was going on.  Baby Bear was examined by his doctor, as well as his sister.  The doctor concluded that there was indeed, something going on.  She was definitely concerned about it and ended up having us do a breathing treatment with him.  I left there to fill his medication and then rush home to wait for the breathing machine to be delivered.  I elevated his crib, and retrieved the humidifier.

It's now Thursday afternoon and the child won't eat food - it sets off his gag-reflex which makes me think his throat is swollen.  Consequently I've pretty well got him attached to him.  He has finally fallen asleep, and I'm hoping that he's feeling better.

 

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Sharing the love for Dad

I just realized that Father's Day swept by without me recognizing it on here.  Don't get me wrong - my beloved has gotten gifts - he received a nice new camera as well as this:

Father's Day Gift

I took the kids up and rented the studio to do the pictures.  I had the letters D, A, and P (I was doing one for pa-pa as well) and it nearly drove him crazy wondering what they were for! 

We also met for breakfast with my Dad/Mom as well as my brother and his family.  It was nice to have everyone together, and we went to a nearby park right after that to let the kids play.

But Dads are so much more than that.  I am combining a couple of posts here, so bear with me.

My Dad -

My Dad is incredible - I couldn't have ever asked for a better Dad.  To this day, I'm his little girl and I always will be.  He's one of the smartest men that I know and could do anything he puts his mind to.  To this day, I get teary eyed whenever I pick out a father's day card for him.  I couldn't imagine life with out him and am incredibly lucky that I still live close to him.  He's a major part of my life and now my children's lives.  He has the heart of my grandma - an absolutely incredible woman.  Growing up, I'm sure, as most kids, that I didn't appreciate him as much as I should have.  He was always there for me, and he still is, and while sometimes I may not have understood the level of parenting, he always did what was best for me.  I love him more than words could possibly ever convey and on a day to recognize fathers, he deserves much recognition.

 

My Husband, the father to Lil' Munchkin and Baby Bear -

When I first told my husband that I was pregnant, I think it shocked him.  I hadn't been on birth control for over a year and a half, but it was still a little unexpected.  We both knew that there was a chance that I might not be able to have children.  When the lil' munchkin arrived, I could see that he loved her.  We spent the first week of her life in the NICU - watching this tiny being poked and prodded, I think both of our hearts grew two sizes.  He wasn't quite sure what to do with her when we brought her home.  He would hold her.  He would feed or change her if I asked him to, but he wasn't quite sure how to build a relationship with her.  She's 2 1/2 now and I must say that watching him with her can bring tears to my eyes.  Between her growing into a child and the arrival of Baby Bear, my beloved has grown into Daddy-hood extremely well.  I see the interaction between him and the munchkin and I watch him make silly faces simply to evoke a bear-grin from our little guy.  He's developed into a Daddy that any child would be proud to call their own - and that makes me love him even more.

Happy Father's Day to you both.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: The neverending guilt that is motherhood

The lil' munchkin and Baby Bear did rather well while I was out of town last week.  But then I came home.  We had a wonderful 3 days together and by Monday, the lil' munchkin was convinced that I was off again.  She had a melt-down by the time I needed to leave for work.  And then there's Baby Bear. He just looks at me.  With those eyes and that smile.  I want to scoop him up and never leave him. 

This week has been rough.  My kids want me home with them and I want to be there.  I keep telling myself that I'm not damaging them and that they do know that I love them.  But that just talks to my brain and not my heart.  There's so much that I want to do with them and yet every second feels like it's just a rush to get through another day.

Pick them up from the sitters.

Rush home to make dinner.

Bath time.

Bed time for Baby Bear

Bed time for Lil'  Munchkin

Bed time for me so that we can get up and rush our lives over all over again.

 

Shouldn't there be more to it than this? 

 

I hope.  I don't want to rush away the days.  Lil' munchkin is already 2 1/2!  Where in the world did that time go?  It seems like just yesterday that I didn't know if I would ever be capable of even having children.

My beloved and I are discussing a third - we're in negotiations as he would say.  We both know that things have to change if we truly want to go for three - we can't both keep up the pace that we are doing.

I try to pull away from the house in the morning and know that I'm doing the right thing, but I'm not sure.  I told my beloved that I'm sure I'll feel guilt no matter what decision I make...

That part just sucks!

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Home Sweet Home

I'm the type of person that when I'm done with something, I'm very done.  By the time we got on the plane to come home yesterday, my tolerance level had deterioriated, I was tired, I wanted to see my kids and my beloved, and I couldn't stand that I still had 3 hours to go.

But as you can tell by my typing this, I didn't throttle anybody, I didn't scream out my inpatience at the morons patrons sitting in front of me (althugh I must admit to not caring how often I bumped them when I stood up), and I was able to maintain a high enough level of dignity to allow me to complete the final part of my trip without giving me a criminal record.

By the time we got to the baggage claim, I saw my beloved pushing our train of a stroller through to me.  About half-way over, the lil' munchkin saw me and began singing out my name.  The hug that ensued was probably the only one I'll get in this lifetime.  She wrapped her entire body around me and we reconnected instantly.

I knelt to caress Baby Bear's cheek and the child couldn't stop grinning at me.  And here I thought he would forget me in the 4 days that I was gone.

We spent the day together barley getting out of each other's sight.

It's good to be home.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: Making it a little easier...

I'm very thankful that my job doesn't take me away any more often than it does.  On top of that, this business trip has been rather relaxing... what with my 3:00 massage, then pooltime, then dinner.  But, I promise, it's business - we're scoping out property for an event... Gee, how I love scoping.

Regardless of how I feel about being away, I know one thing.  Talking to my daughter and feeling her love pour through the phone at me makes it all just a little less hard.

Each time I speak with her, I hear, Mommy!  Mommmmeeeeeee repeated over and over again in her sing-songy voice. Each time, I answer in the affirmative, that yes, it is indeed me and I will be home soon.

In 12 hours I will be making my way to the airport.  In about 16 hours, I'll be wrapped in two little arms, smothered with kisses, and life will be right again.

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com

On Vox: "The good part of the whole mothering thing"

Yesterday morning, Tuesday, I had to say goodbye to not only my beloved, but my lil' munchkin and my baby bear.  I was heading to Florida.  Not to return until Friday morning.  This is the first time I've left Baby Bear and although I have been away from the lil' munchkin a few times, it's still not easy. 

I'd talked to her for a week letting her know that mommy had to go out of town and Daddy would put her to bed while I was gone.

It wasn't easy.  On the flight, I looked out at the clouds that were so thick and thought how my lil' munchkin would enjoy seeing them.  I missed both kids horribly and hadn't even been away for a full workday.

I called home and the lil' munchkin was proclaiming, rather loudly, in the background that she wanted to talk to me.  She kept asking me if I was "coming over."  I told her that in a couple of days her and Daddy and Baby Bear would come to the airport to pick me up.  She's doing really well.

I received an email from my beloved this morning that made me realize that yes, the kids are okay, and yes, while this is hard on not only them, but me as well, it's well worth it...

 

"...as i was hugging barrett before putting him to bed he looked up at me and smiled and i thought, "so this is the good part of the whole mothering thing".  it was something i'll never forget.  guys don't understand this as it isn't a part of our dna..."

As the primary caregiver, I experience this daily.  My children invoke emotions in me that I hadn't ever experienced prior to having them.  I know this is true for my beloved as well, but it's typically more on a "protect" basis.  He plays with them tremendously, but he doesn't often get to experience the softer side of parenting... This is a good trip.

As much as I hate being away from them, I know that it will make his relationship with them even stronger.

It is really only a small portion of "the good part of the whole mothering thing."

Originally posted on thebugandthebear.vox.com